Leah Wants to be Loved by Jacob - Jealousy and Envy

Torah Study Notes 16 June 2012 (from Howard)

• Overriding theme up to this point has been Leah’s despondency over lack of Jacob’s love.
• 29:34. And she conceived again and bore a son, and she said, "Now this time my husband will be attached to me, for I have borne him three sons; therefore, He named him Levi.
• The name “Levi:”
• לוי is close to לוה, which means to lend or borrow, as in being generous to the poor by “lending to God.” Levi will later “lend” his services to God.
• לוה also means to accompany be a companion. Leah does believe that this birth will make Jacob “attached” to her [Me’Am Lo’Ez].
• Who named Levi? The verb for naming is in masculine, so it was not Leah. Midrash explanations for who did the naming:
• It was Jacob, who reconciled with Leah.
• [Rashi] There is an aggadic midrash in Deuteronomy Rabbah, [which relates] how the Holy One, blessed be He, sent [the angel] Gabriel and he brought him (Levi) before Him, and He gave him this name, and He gave him the twenty-four priestly gifts; and because he accompanied him (לִוָּהוּ) with gifts, he named him Levi. These 24 gifts are enumerated in Bava Kamma 110b.
• It was Lavan, who saw the babies as a source of labor [filthy capitalist].
• [Rashi] Since the Matriarchs were prophetesses, they knew that twelve tribes would emanate from Jacob, and that he would marry four wives, she said, “From now on, he will find no fault with me for I have contributed my share in (producing) sons.” - [from Bereishith Rabbathi, attributed to Rabbi Moshe Hadarshan, Midrash Aggadah] [I.e., three sons were thought to be each wife’s share of the twelve.] In other words, with her third child, Leah has given her share of the twelve sons: 12 sons ÷ 4 wives = 3 sons per wife. More on this math in 29:35.
• From a 13^th century midrash, France – Leah can hold one son in each arm at once. With a third son, Jacob must hold one of them. Thus, Leah and Jacob are joined in this manner.
• Elie Munk (page 402) – Levi and Moses each three letters in their names; Levi and Moses were third sons and Jacob was the third of the Patriarchs; the midrash extolls third element of any grouping as the one that reaches the “highest perfection.” Thus, in Deuteronomy 10:8. “The Lord separated [chose] the tribe of Levi to bear the ark of the covenant of the Lord, to stand before the Lord to serve Him, and to bless in His Name, to this day.’
• 29:35 - And she conceived again and bore a son, and she said, "This time, I will thank the Lord! Therefore, she named him Judah, and [then] she stopped bearing.

אוֹדֶה, praise or thank, a shortened form of אֲהוֹדֵה [?], the full form of which is in Psalm 28:7 and from which the name יהודה is derived.

Elie Munk writes (pages 402-403), “The name יהודה encompasses both meanings its root – הדה, gratitude and אדה, admission.” Leah “took charge of the scepter of gratitude and bequeathed it to her offspring.” See Lieber excerpt below.

• Basis of name of the Jewish people and “thank you.”
• Rashi - since I have taken more than my share. Consequently, I must offer up thanks. — [Genesis Rabbah 71:4]. Meaning 12 tribes ÷ 4 wives = 3 each wife. With four sons, Leah has borne more than her fair share. In other words, Leah was grateful to God for the “extra measure that she received over the share that was coming to her.” That fourth child was the reason that Leah gratefully praised God after Judah’s birth.
• Midrash from Rabbi of Ger – Jews are יהודים, y’hudim, a grateful people but undeserved; יהודה contains name of God, יה and a ד, standing for poor people. This suggests that Jews are poor paupers, undeserved of such gifts from God.
• דַּל means poor (with connotations of powerlessness, helplessness, insignificance; root is דלל).
• [King] David has two ד’s, signifying a poor and humble person.
• Zechariah 9:9. Be exceedingly happy, O daughter of Zion; Shout, O daughter of Jerusalem. Behold! Your king shall come to you. He is just and victorious; humble, and riding a donkey and a foal, the offspring of [one of] she-donkeys.

“Your king” is the messiah, who will humbly bring God’s word to people by riding a lowly animal. [Rashi]

[Talmud Brachot 7a] From the day that the Holy One, blessed be He, created His world there was no man that praised the Holy One, blessed be He, until Leah came and praised Him. In other words, from Creation to Leah, no one had offered gratitude to God. This seems puzzling, since the patriarchs must have thanked God for everything He accomplished for them and the people. Leah’s expression of gratitude, however, was different.

While Noah, Abraham, and Jacob erected altars as expressions of thanks to God, “Leah was the first to transform her feelings of gratitude into language, creating words of prayer.” Leah teaches us “that when we feel more grateful than we could ever anticipate, we should stop to give words to our feelings.” She lets “her gratitude well up and silently [says] ‘thank you [multiple times]’ then [names] the reason she blesses. It’s worship as a way of being, worship as a way of engaging God and everyday life at the same time.” In her every action – playing with her children, baking, gardening, sleeping well, and making love -- Leah prays with her whole being.” [Ochs, Sarah Laughed, page 181-182]

The word הוֹדָאָה connotes both gratitude and admission. One can admit that he/she is wrong about something. One can express gratitude for a kind act. However, a more profound act of gratitude occurs by admitting that what was initially detrimental turned out to be favorable. Leah initially felt unloved and heartbroken because Jacob didn’t love her as much as Rachel. However, after bearing four children, she realized how grateful she should be, having more sons than any other wife or concubine. She knew that the whole episode was for her benefit and that God deserved her praise. From Lieber, Moshe M. The Torah Treasury. An Anthology of Insights, Commentary and Anecdotes on the Weekly Torah Readings. Brooklyn: Mesorah Publications, Ltd., 2002. Page 77, citing Maayana Shel Torah. Wellsprings of Torah by Rabbi Alexander Zusia Friedman (Judaica Press, 1986?) BM724 .F71 1986;

Another view of Leah’s situation from Vanessa Ochs (Sarah Laughed, pages 180-181.

“Leah has a spiritual gift, the ability to name each and every thing for which she is grateful. She doesn’t feel happiness as a vague wish. She notices all the particulars, and she puts her gratitude into words: ‘I thank you, God, for the miracle of seeing my baby’s chest move up and down as he breathes. I thank you, God for the milk that is spurting so quickly from my breasts.’ Leah’s spiritual gift is a form of prayer, a streaming conversation that takes place sometimes silently, in her head, overheard by no one. But more often, she will give her voice to her delight. Praising God for her sons, for her sister, for Jacob, for the sheep on the grassy hills, for the almond flowers, she feels connected to every other human being, as if she were tied by strands of gratitude to everything and everyone in creation.

“For Leah, naming is a rigorous spiritual discipline. She tells herself at each moment, ‘Name the beauty you are witnessing, name the aroma you smell. Don’t let a detail escape you.’ For Leah, naming a child is best of all, because each name is a prayer, one she can repeat each time she calls her child … Saying each name, Leah witnesses: God is not so far away, but is attached to her and to her children; God will love her and God will see her, even if Jacob cannot.”

Leah blesses God in her unique way. She writes no poetry; builds no altars; prepares no sacrifice. Her encounters with God occur not in buildings, tents, or under anyone’s supervision. She approaches God “autonomously, engaging in rituals that dramatize social ties with God, ancestors, family, and community. Leah’s style of blessing is immediate, personal, and informal. She blesses by naming.”

• 30:1 - And Rachel saw that she had not borne [any children] to Jacob, and Rachel envied her sister, and she said to Jacob, "Give me children, and if not, I am dead." Vey iz mir! Rachel notices that Leah has all the children and becomes envious of her older sister.
• וַתְּקַנֵּא, and she envied [Leah] dark red color related to the verb for envy …?????
• Rashi - She envied her good deeds. She said, “If she had not been more righteous than I, she would not have merited children” (Genesis Rabbah 71:5). Rachel knows that Leah is more pious, so Rachel wishes that she was that way.
• Alter translates וַתְּקַנֵּא as she was jealous, not envious
• Pirke Avot on jealousy
• 4:28 (4:21 in some editions) - Rabbi Elazar HaKapor would say: Envy, lust/desisre, and honor/ambition/pursuit of glory drive a man from the world.

2:16 (2:11 in some versions). Rabbi Joshua would say: An evil eye, the evil inclination, and the hatred of one's fellows, drive a person from the world.

These passages are a paean on selflessness, a lesson in selfishness. An evil eye looks with envy on others.

• Envy or jealousy is one of the three basal instincts that drives a person out of this world and the world to come; people become fixated on what they want; they despise the world because of what they don’t have.

Any one of these personal issues could result in forgetting the Torah and weaken his moral and intellectual fiber [Kravitz, Leonard and Kerry M. Olitsky. PIrke Avot. A Modern Commentary on Jewish Ethics. NY: UAHC Press, 1993, referencing Maimonides. Also, Goldin, Hyman. Ethics of the Fathers. NY: Hebrew Publishing Company, 1962]

• Two levels of jealousy?
• Proverbs on envy, jealousy leading to decay

23:7 - Let your heart not envy the sinners, but fear of the Lord all day.	No one should envy or emulate sinners, no matter how happy they appear. Instead, one should transfer his/her envy to scrupulous people to gather strength to grow closer to God. One can emulate the standards of righteous people without outdoing or competing with those people, especially when the result would be setbacks for others.
	[Ginsberg, Eliezer and Yosef Weinberger. Mishlei. Proverbs. A New Translation with Commentary Anthologized from Talmudic, Midrashic, and Rabbinic Sources. Volume II. Brooklyn: Mesorah Publications, Ltd. 2007.]
14:30 - A healing heart is the life of the flesh, but anger [envy] is the rot of the bones. 12:4 - A virtuous woman is the crown of her husband, but an embarrassing one is like rot in his bones	A healing heart and envy are opposites. A person with the former will have life in his bones, i.e., a pleasant life free of jealousy, hatred, and strife. He will be cheerful and healthy Someone with the latter will have bones that rot from anxiety, even after death, and never regenerate. [Ginsberg, Eliezer. Mishlei. Proverbs. A New Translation with Commentary Anthologized from Talmudic, Midrashic, and Rabbinic Sources. Volume I. Brooklyn: Mesorah Publications, Ltd. 1998, citing many sources.]

• Chassidic parable – a horse kicks his reflection before drinking from a river so as to drive away the competition for a scarce resource. Why? Isn’t there is enough water for all? There is enough seed in Jacob to make twelve children, plenty to go around.
• Another Chassidic parable on self-destructive behavior during jealousy…

Talmud Bava Batra 21a. An exception to the injunctions on envy is scholars competing for bring wisdom and knowledge to the world. Jealousy can be constructive, a competitive dive that brings progress. Rachel can use her jealousy to make her more pious.

Raba also said: If we have a teacher who gets on [reads prayers or scripture] with the children and there is another who can get on better, we do not replace the first by the second, for fear that the second when appointed will become indolent [having no competitor to fear]. R. Dimi from Nehardea, however, held that he would exert himself still more if appointed: 'the jealousy of scribes increases wisdom.' [I.e., the jealousy of the one who has been replaced will be a stimulus to the other not to disgrace himself.]

Rashi writes, citing Genesis Rabbah 71:6, She envied her [Leah’s] good deeds. She said, “If she had not been more righteous than I, she would not have merited children.” [From notes to Genesis Rabbah (Kleinman/Artscroll)] Rachel was envious of Leah’s righteousness, which is regarded as wholesome and laudable.

• Anthony Trollope novel, He Knew He Was Right [?]
• Zelig Pliskin – no escaping normal human emotions (envy); never assume that other people have no envy. I.e., avoid boasting, mentioning what other people have that another doesn’t have.
• Rachel abruptly addresses Jacob: “give me children or I die!”
• How would a husband react to this? Jacob would feel inadequate; he’s not entirely to blame. “What am I, chopped liver?”
• Why did Rachel use these words? She would be “dead” without a line of descendants. Life is not worth living; she is passionate about having children.
• Is Rachel calling for adoption?
• Rashi - Did your father [not] do that for your mother? Did he not pray for her? [From Genesis Rabbah 71:7]. In other words, Rebecca is saying, do what your father did, pray for me. Or, bring in another wife.
• Nahum Sarna [JPS Torah Commentary. Genesis] on “I am dead” [or “I shall die”]:
• Genesis 25:22 just after Isaac pleads to God when Rebecca is barren. As the twins were struggling in her womb, Rebecca cried out, “Why do I exist.” It was a difficult pregnancy and Rebecca feared a miscarriage.
• Genesis 27:46 on Esau’s wife – Rebecca is disgusted and would rather die if Jacob married a Hittite wife. She laments, “what good will life be to me?”
• Rashi - From here [we learn] that whoever has no children is counted as dead [from Genesis Rabbah 71:6]. Rachel is anguished because she cannot name children.
• Jacob consoles her by saying that these words only apply to the wicked; if childless, then good deeds are your children.
• Isaiah on yad vashem; legacy will stay with Jewish nation.

56: 5 - Even unto them will I give in My house and within My walls a monument and a memorial better than sons and daughters; I will give them an everlasting memorial, that shall not be cut off.

Or, "I will give them in My house and in My walls a place and a name, better than sons and daughters; an everlasting name I will give him, which will not be discontinued.

וָשֵׁם יָד is literally “a monument and a name.”

“One of man’s greatest fears is that of dying and not being remembered, that’s why he builds monuments. All his life a man is obedient to G-d, observing His laws and his goodness seems to go unnoticed, when he dies nobody remembers that he was ever here on earth, excepting his children and those close to him.

“The words of Isaiah are a comfort to the G-d fearing man that he will be remembered, through his obedience to G-d he has caused a much more significant memory than the transitory memory of human beings. Through his observance of G-d’s commandments he has caused his name to be recorded in G-d’s memory. G-d will remember him forever because he was obedient in observing G-d’s commandments. His children cannot remember forever, they do their best to create ways to memorialize him for future generations but there’s nothing they can do which can guarantee everlasting memory. Only G-d can give an everlasting name because He is everlasting.”

[From http://jerusalemwalks.com/holysites/yad-vashem.html, accessed 19 June 2012]

“Man” in these paragraphs refers to women, too. Without offspring, Rachel fears that no one will remember her; there will be no “monuments” to her life.

• Ramban – Rachel is looking for a sign of love but doesn’t get it, instead, anger. She could die of grief.

Actually, Ramban’s interpretation is about Jacob praying for Rachel. He writes that Rachel told Jacob emphatically that he should pray for her until she conceived. If not, she would die of grief. This request may have been inappropriate because of her envy of Leah. However, Rachel thought that from his great love for her, Jacob would “fast and don sackcloth and ashes and keep praying until she would have children.”

Ramban further asks, if Rachel’s childlessness is her fault, why should not Jacob pray for her? After all, other righteous people pray for those not related to them, such as Elijah and Elisha (1 Kings 17:21 for a widow’s dying son; and 2 Kings 4:16 for the poor debt-ridden Shunammite woman who gave Elisha room and board and who eventually had a son).

[From Blinder, Yaakov. The Torah: With Ramban’s Commentary Translated, Annotated, and Elucidated. Bereishis/Genesis Volume II. Brooklyn, NY: Mesorah Publications. 2004]

• Midrash Rabbah 71:6 footnotes: Rachel intention was to stir Jacob’s compassion so that he would pray for her.